Guest Post Tuesday – It Feels Like a Struggle Against Flesh and Blood

I am pleased to have a great guy joining me.  Sonny Lemmons is one of those guys who is really easy to connect with. We connected a while back and from the beginning I could tell he was someone genuine, real, honest and transparent about how he lives his life.  What impresses me the most  is his intense devotion to his son.

Today’s post is a subject that doesn’t always get discussed but is one we can all related to.  I appreciate his willingness to be open, honest and share.  To me this again speaks to the quality of man he is.  He makes it clear he’s not perfect, has struggles and yet he knows what truly matters

In case you are wondering Sonny is his real name, he lives with his wife and son in South Carolina.  He is a very proud SAHD (stay at home dad) who is an imperfect follower of a perfect God and dreams of being a writer.  You can find Sonny on Twitter @sonnylemmons, which after you read his very transparent  post you should go and do immediately. After you have followed him on Twitter go and check out his blog  Looking Through the Windshield  –

It was supposed to be a completely stress-free day. I headed off to Panera to spend a few hours reading, writing, and taking advantage of the free WiFi. Based on the number of other people I saw spread out through the booths, with their laptops open and furiously typing away on them, I apparently wasn’t the only one who had this thought. I walked over to the area of the store with the fewest number of people in it, and sat down to let the creative juices flow. …with the aid of a large coffee. Refills rule.

It was supposed to be a completely stress-free day. To be honest, I’m not sure how long I sat in my booth. And I have no clue what the number of other people who might have come and gone in the time I sat there might be. What I do know is that right about the time that I pulled my head up from my keyboard to stretch a bit, one of the other wannabe- writers who was sitting two tables away, directly across from me, decided to stand up, pack up their things, and go.

It was supposed to be a completely stress-free day. I had not noticed my literary neighbor before now. We were both wrapped up in our own little respective worlds. Neither of us wore anything that would have made us stand out in a crowd, but when she stood up, I noticed that her clothes – while neither gaudy nor frumpy – fit her. Well. Quite well. Remarkably well. In “all the right ways” well.

It was supposed to be a completely stress-free day. The only temptation I thought I was going to encounter was supposed to be in the form of baked goods at the pastry counter. Not that at the moment she stood up I was ready to ditch my wife and child and run off with her; instead, the temptation came as it always comes: subtly, almost innocuously, and internalized rather than expressed outwardly. A thought. A raised eyebrow. A wedging of a particular thorn deeper into my flesh.

Christ, as it turns out, is not the only one who stands at the door and knocks.

Ever since puberty, when my hormones went all Tasmanian Devil on me, I – like many other men – have struggled with this. Lust. Desire. “Coveting” for Old Testament fans out there. And having grown up in a time and place (Mississippi in the 1980’s) where sexuality was just not talked about in church, I “learned” all I knew about sex from lunch table and band hall discussions, starting in the 6th grade. My heart and mind were ill-equipped from both a spiritual and a practical point of view for the battle that every man must eventually face, and I have spent the better part of my adult life constantly, continually having to guard and check my heart (Proverbs 4:23).

I have come to believe that the reason it’s referred to as a “sex drive” is because it takes our minds places: down paths we shouldn’t be on; paths that are dimly lit and dark; and far too often, just as when we drive in our cars, we travel on this path thinking we can go just a few miles faster than what the law allows and still be okay.

But the reality is that although we act as though the weight of the burden we carry lies between our legs, it is actually a weight we carry in our hearts and minds. When Christ said in Matthew 11:30 that His burden was light, I don’t think He was specifically speaking to men about this issue. However, that verse, coupled with I Corinthians10:13(NLT) – “The temptations in your life are no different from what others experience. And God is faithful. He will not allow the temptation to be more than you can stand. When you are tempted, he will show you a way out so that you can endure.” – have helped time and again when the temptation, the knocking comes. When I am weary and heavy laden.

It helps to know I am not alone, neither without my Savior nor my brothers in Christ. It helps to know that this struggle is not something I have walked (and continue to walk) on my own, with no other person able to understand or sympathize. Do I still stumble and fall? Yep. Matter of fact, as I write this, I feel those all-too-familiar tugs at the corners of my mind to just let my thoughts drift.

It was supposed to be a completely stress-free day.

It instead became a completely blessed day, complete with an opportunity to live in redemption.

About Chris Goforth

West Coast Hipster Ninja husband and Papa- allowing Jesus to impact every aspect of my life while raising 6 kids, taking photos, being outdoors & playing Settles of Catan. View all posts by Chris Goforth

One response to “Guest Post Tuesday – It Feels Like a Struggle Against Flesh and Blood

  • David

    Great thoughts. There is no doubt that this sort of thing is a struggle for probably most if not all guys. I appreciate your openness and agree that it’s good to know that you’re not alone and that there is a God who is willing and able to forgive us after moments like that.

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